From TES issue 38 (March 2006)
Series 3
Quest: The Shield.
Dungeoneer: Cliff.Advisors: Matthew, Richard and James.

Home town: Felixstowe, Suffolk.
Team score: 6 out of 10.

The second team of series 3 did rather well, although the exact nature of how and why they died has caused some confusion in the past. Read on, and all will become clear.
Level One:

After the usual die roll to start off the quest, Cliff meets Motley on a rocky ledge. The jester poses Cliff an easy riddle, which is answered correctly in no time. Motley gives Cliff a spell called DRINK.

After being chased along some more rocky ledges by the Armoured Behemoth, Cliff arrives in a room that contains a large pool of purple water, but no door. Treguard gives the team a hint: "It's a thirst for knowledge that you have, but it's water that bars your way." - Treguard. The DRINK spell is cast, and the water drains away through a small hole in the wall of the pool. Cliff has to crouch down and crawl through this hole, into the clue room.

Brangwen is on guard, and Cliff answers two of her three questions correctly. As well as the usual wall monster information from previous series, Brangwen reveals the first step - music. From the clue table, Cliff picks up a bone and an egg timer.

After negotiating the spectral scorpion's sting and a precarious narrow path over an enormous black hole, Cliff reaches the Serpent's Mouth. The egg timer is utilised here to freeze the long, pink tongue, providing a stable bridge to reach the rocky ledge.

In the Dungeon kitchen, Motley is trying to make Mellisandre laugh. She refuses to do this, until Cliff arrives, and his comical appearance tickles Mellie's funny-bone. Mellie provides Cliff with the second step - laughter - and, when Mr. Grimwold arrives, placates the ogre until Cliff has escaped: "Mrs. Grimwold, she doesn't like people in her kitchen, and Mr. Grimwold, well... he just doesn't like people!" - Mellisandre.

Cliff finally arrives in the wellway room, where Mrs. Grimwold is waiting for him. Festus is with her, leading to an amusing scene, the end result of which is that Cliff gives Mrs. Grimwold his bone to feed to Festus, in return for which she conjures up a well for Cliff to use to descend to level two. As he is doing this, Mr. Grimwold puts in another appearance, but Mrs. Grimwold keeps him at bay while Cliff climbs into the well.
Level Two:

After jumping off the Spindizzy and puzzling out another easy riddle from Motley about a choice of five doors, Cliff learns the third step from the talking crow - on your knees.

A large, hairy [giant foot] blocking some doors is Cliff's final obstacle before he reaches Merlin's room.

After summoning the three steps without difficulty, Cliff meets Merlin, who poses two questions. With both answered correctly, Merlin rewards Cliff with the spell DANCE, and even demonstrates how it might work!

Cliff next has to avoid some goblins in the [Great Corridor of the Catacomb], before negotiating the Cavern Range.

Cliff then reaches a room with four doors, where he is accosted by the burly Scottish warrior, McGrew. The team cast DANCE against him, causing the clansman to prance around the room to the accompaniment of bagpipe music. Now, it has been said in the past that it was wrong of the team to cast the spell here, so let's set the record straight once and for all: casting the DANCE spell against McGrew was the right thing to do! What the team did wrong, however, was fail to stick around for long enough to show mercy and release McGrew from the spell, for which they would have earned his comradeship until the end of the level: "Will you nae take pity? I'll do anything for thee!" - McGrew. So, the team abandon McGrew in his prancing state, and Cliff leaves the room without a vital ally.

The minecart chamber follows, but a haunted sword is on guard. Now, as we know from watching Ross's quest later in the series, McGrew would have fought this off with his own sword in next to no time, and then provided the necessary muscle-power to push Cliff and the minecart down the tunnel to level three. However, without the Scotsman there to help him, Cliff is doomed: "If only you'd listened to the pleas of McGrew, then perhaps you would have had the help you need here. There's no way down that tunnel on foot, and besides, this chamber appears to be haunted!" - Treguard. The haunted sword relentlessly pursues Cliff around the chamber, sapping his life force until it runs out, bringing an end to the quest.
Summary:

A very good performance, and one of the longest quests in series 3. However, when it came down to it, undue haste meant that the boys just couldn't cut the mustard in the end.

[Previous team: Team 1 of Series 3
Next team: Team 3 of Series 3]

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