Knightmare Lexicon - A Knightmare Encyclopædia

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1. Team 6 of Series 5
From TES issue 64 (July 2010)
 [Related Image] Series 5
Quest: The Cup.
Dungeoneer: Alex I.
Advisors: Ian, Grant and Richard.
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Home town: Amersham, Buckinghamshire.
Team score: 7 out of 10.

Taking a break from fagging for Ian, Grant and Richard at Dr Challoner’s Grammar School in Amersham, Alex was given the chance to have a go at being their dungeoneer instead. Sadly, they let him down a bit… although I’m sure he didn’t hold a grudge, and was back stoking their fires and warming the seat for them when school resumed in September!

Level One: The team’s first task is to choose their clue objects, from an unusually plentiful array of five. With a little help from the scroll and a little common sense, they manage to make the correct choice of a bar of gold and Gwendoline’s green arrow, rejecting a ruby, a key and a lantern. A ride in the Descender leads to a room where Hordriss is “in disguise” as Harris the beggar. In return for a spell called HERO, the team agrees to deliver a book to Sylvester Hands. Hordriss places the book into the knapsack, apparently having treated it with magic so that he can bend the rules of the quest for his own ends, which is one of the last delightfully ambiguous things he ever does: ”Don’t be alarmed - it will not be consumed, despite what you’ve been told.” – Hordriss.
 [Related Image] In the Wolfglade, Alex makes use of a spyglass, revealing a fairly standard scene between Skarkill and Lord Fear, which tells us that an encounter with the Goblin Master is undoubtedly on the cards. In another part of the forest, Alex meets Gwendoline, who is pleased that he is carrying the green arrow but still demands two correct answers from three questions if she is to reveal the password. Throwing into doubt the value of a private education, the team only scores one, but Gwendoline decides to be generous: ”I can see you’re trying, and you’re carrying my green arrow, so I’ll let you have the password.” – Gwendoline. The password is “sabretooth” and it allows Alex – unsurprisingly – to get past a blocker.

When Alex is accosted by Sylvester Hands, Hordriss’s book transforms the thief into a hobgoblin, by means of a very cheap effect that involves Paul Valentine clasping a goblin mask to his face and running off to the sound of very muffled screams. The HERO spell then saves the day when Skarkill turns up, as Sir Hugh arrives and quickly sends the Goblin Master packing. A jaunt across the Rock Paper Scissors causeway leads Alex onto Smirkenorff’s back, where Elita is on hand to negotiate payment. She is more than happy to accept the bar of gold (which Alex has been carrying since the very first room) and helps Alex into the saddle before Smirky flies him to level two: ”Hang on tight, and hold onto your breakfast!” – Elita.
 [Related Image] Level Two: Again, the choice of clue objects comes first, and Alex leaves the room with a ruby and a divining rod in hand. He then meets Hordriss and Elita, and it soon becomes apparent that Elita’s voice is missing. Hordriss deduces that Lord Fear has stolen it, and gives the team a spell – BAG – to capture the voice if they should happen to encounter it. A spyglass sequence reveals that Skarkill has allowed Elita’s voice to escape, and it is now loose on level two. Predictably, Alex encounters the voice in the next room, and it begins to make fun of him. The advisors think they are being asked some kind of riddle, and Alex has to explain to them that he is, in fact, being insulted by Elita’s voice. The BAG spell is utilised to capture the voice (despite the fact that the team stupidly tried to cast it on a skull ghost in the previous chamber, and therefore should actually have squandered it) and Elita is called. After some initial rudeness, she is grateful to Alex for returning her voice and she tells him that the password is “black rock”.
 [Related Image] When Pickle informs the team that something magic is hidden in a castle courtyard, the divining rod is used and a chest drops from the sky. Alex gains a key from the chest, apparently to open the way to level three. The blocker is sated by the password but – after all that - the quest is undone on the causeway. The team’s directions are too slow and hesitant, and after all their previous stumbles, Alex is sent plummeting downwards when he is left standing on a hexagon for an unusually long time. At the time this seemed very unfair, but with hindsight you can see why they were killed off.
 [Related Image] Summary: In terms of progress, the third best team of the series. They almost reached level three, but a series of stumbles and hesitations led to their eventual downfall.

[Previous team: Team 5 of Series 5
Next team: Team 7 of Series 5]

Provided By: Eyeshield, 2010-08-28 18:16:54
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